I didn’t really sleep. There were times of rest. Like wading in the shallow part of the river. And times of intense energy, like jumping into the center of the flow and being pulled very quickly toward whatever destination was chosen. I felt the flow pulling me. Nudging at my core. I was excited.

I had heard the noises coming from the Victory Hotel late into the night. More than once, I found myself curious what Queen Ann and her crew were doing there. Why they continued to ride the same path day in and day out, long past their need to do so. Why did anyone? There was so much to explore. To learn. To evolve toward. Like my parents, I found myself pulled to new and uncharted spaces and times. Still, everyone I met including them seemed to have routines and habits that weighted them down, making life harder for themselves than it needed to be.

I spent much of the night hopping in and out of my parents’ dreams. My dad remembered them better than my mom did. Sometimes I would hover in the background as if an extra in a play. Sometimes I reach out more directly, choosing to appear as some majestic creature. I like to serve as my dad’s right hand man. Sometimes I play the part of friends or other famous people he might recognize. Other times, he would find me in a dream unexpectedly. They always felt so real. Those were my favorite.

As the sun rose, I could make out characters that looked familiar across the park and the town. There were other cowboys making their way across town with herds of wild horses. I could also make out remnants of another time. More faded. Spanish men in robes like I saw at Juniper Springs. With several heavily packed mules. As if they were on some sort of long trip or pilgrimage. There was lots of activity down by the river. It was about a mile away, but close enough that I could make it out if I squinted. Women were walking peacefully along the banks, gathering berries and grasses. Children were playing. Men were fishing. I understood their attraction to it. The water flowed so freely and provided such life to so many spirits whose memories continue bringing them back.

“You day dreamin’ again boy?” Queen Ann’s voice brought me back to the present moment. I smiled brightly at her. “Sort of. I was just enjoying some time along the river.” I spared the details. I wasn’t sure if Queen Ann or her gang could see the others and I wasn’t sure what they would do if they could. “Well good! You’re going to enjoy a lot more of it today. Remember, keep the cattle between you and the river until we cross. The first couple of crossings are shallow, but sometimes the Green River floods its banks past Browns Hole and the cattle tend to spread out, so we’ll need you to use that big silver bullet of yours to herd them as much as you can.” I looked over at my parents’ Airstream. “My dad is driving. I’m not really sure what I can do but I’ll try.”

Queen Ann, Butch Cassidy and the rest of their crew loaded onto horses and started out. I followed along the edge of the herd. I hadn’t practiced controlling anything like this before. I was nervous. I could see my parents in the Airstream making their way along the highway next to the river. I focused all my energy and was able to keep pace with it. I wasn’t sure if I was slowing my parents down or I was speeding Queen Ann and the gang up. But somehow we followed along side by side through the canyon.

The first river crossing was no problem. The cattle followed each other, one by one, until all were across safely. The horses followed suit, in front and behind. It’s as if their hooves had pounded tracks here across all time. I could tell this stretch of river had been used for centuries as a crossing. I could smell the animals. And feel their hesitancy and eventual surrender. I leaped from one bank to the other in one swift motion. Just enough to catch a breeze as I did. I couldn’t help but close my eyes and smile as I did. “Impressive” remarked Queen Ann. “How do you do that?” I shrugged. “I have no idea. I just thought about doing it and did it.”

Butch eyed them talking and chimed in “I bet that comes in handy when you need to make a quick escape.” He heartily spit his chewing tobacco for extra emphasis. I didn’t care for Butch. My curiosity and interest in Ann didn’t extend to the rough and tumble outlaw. I wondered if Butch was doing penance for a lifetime of bad deeds. He seemed to have a constant frown on his face. And was always looking out at the horizon instead of paying attention to what – or who – was right in front of him.

The second crossing we came to, I was feeling even more confident than before. I wondered if I could fly even higher, even further. The river was wider here. I flew in a circle about 20 feet off the ground, closing my eyes and feeling the wind in my face before landing on the opposite bank right next to Butch. “Yeah, I bet that comes in reeaaal handy.” He said quietly, narrowing his eyes and staring intently at me. I had never felt so uncomfortable. I wasn’t sure how to describe the emotions that Butch felt when he said it, but I could feel them. And it sent shivers down my spine.

“I’m beginning to like you stranger” said Queen Ann. “I do hope you’re planning on staying awhile.” I smiled in her direction. I loved the attention. And the way these souls talked. As if any of us could be “strangers.” What did that even mean I wondered? These are only the second group of souls I’ve taken the time to talk with on this journey and both of them have used the word.

I knew my parents wouldn’t stick around for long, but I kept it to myself. We traveled through a lush valley. I could see echoes of animals and birds as far as the eye could see, enjoying the marshy ground. The cattle slowed down to enjoy some fresh grass. They steered clear of larger animals who’d been here before them, like giant bison and camels, even a great woolly mammoth. I could see my parents and the Airstream about a hundred yards ahead to the right. They were veering away from the river. Ann followed the direction I was looking. “I’m going to need you to stop that silver bullet while we cross the river” she said. “The water floods the other side of the valley and we never make it past.”

I raised my eyes at the comment, not sure who or what she meant. But I did as she requested, focusing my energy on my Dad. It didn’t take long for the Airstream to pull slowly to a stop. I could see my parents get out. They looked worried. I didn’t want them to worry. But even I was starting to worry. I believed everything was perfectly divine, but what did any of us really know? I could sense the vibrations of my companions weren’t quite right. They were antsy.

I took a deep breath and looked across the valley for clues. I could make out pictures along the canyon walls, left by previous admirers centuries ago. I could tell the path was well worn by those who had come before and after. It was hard to tell where water ended and land began. They seemed to blur across the landscape. “I don’t mean to pry miss” I took a deep breath and looked quietly at Ann trying to decide how to phrase the question. Ann was maneuvering between a heifer and a large boulder downstream on her dark chestnut horse. She kept her attention on the river’s flow, but she tilted her head so she could hear me better. “But you will anyway?” she quipped.

“I’m just curious is all. What do you see across this valley? Why are you here?” I decided to leave the question vague and go from there. Queen Ann smiled. “I see my land. My river. My friends. Freedom. Here I’m in charge of my life. No one else. Sink or swim, I get to live as I please. ” They were getting closer to the Airstream. I could hear and feel a thundering roar. It was getting closer. I started to understand what was about to happen and why my companions had wanted me and “the big silver bullet” to join them. Many animals and birds started fleeing the opposite direction. Others looked up, wondering what was coming. And some continued about their day, completely oblivious to the impending events.

It was water. Lots of it. Headed right toward them. Ann raised her arm as they approached “Okay everyone, get behind the big silver bullet. If this doesn’t work, we’ll have Elliot fly us up to that ridge.” I turned sharply, realizing they were planning to use my parents as a blockade between them and the water. I wasn’t sure how this worked. Would my parents make it? They didn’t seem to notice it coming. This was a terrible idea. I didn’t want to take the chance. I could see a pickup truck driving toward them from the nearby hill. The driver stopped and looked right at me. Then looked toward the rage of water.

I closed my eyes and prayed to connect my parents to the truck across whatever time and space separated them. The pickup suddenly turned around and headed back toward the hill it had come from. Even through the time and space that separated us, I could see the license plate clearly. It read “LULU.” A dog in the back barked my direction as if asking me to follow. I prayed for the truck, the dog and my parents to make it to the edge of the valley safely beyond the water’s reach. My parents got back in the truck and followed the pickup a short distance behind.

“What are you doing?” screamed Ann. “This was our chance to survive!” Butch and her fellow crew glared at me intensely. They raised their shotguns my direction. I didn’t know what to do. I had never experienced anything like this. I closed my eyes and prayed. I wasn’t even sure what words came out of my mouth. All I could hear was the water’s roar. The more I went within myself, the more I could feel the gush and whir around me. But I felt as if I was rising. Getting lighter. I couldn’t tell if it was the wave itself or some enormous creature within it wrapping themselves around me, lifting me to safety. I was too afraid to open my eyes to find out.